dead end

"you pursue music, not relationships."
"i know."
"why?"
Hm...because i only know the cold side of love;
i see how hugs lead to bad things - even for children;
family is a word people throw around
...to manipulate.
i've so many bruises that i don't know what normal skin color is.
i've so many puzzles i dont know which way is up.
the most dangerous are those who appear not to be.
safety is an illusion.
relationships are ships
that always sink.
they really are "here today, gone tomorrow,"
it's just that some todays are longer,
which make the tomorrows harder to bear.
No one likes to say goodbye to good things.
I get to do it so often...too often.
Sometimes i get tired of running, tired of chasing
and weary through every bone of my soul, and
when it becomes the same thing over and over,
it's predictable and then...
"it's not worth it," I said, and upon this decision, was glad that I'm not God, for i would have nothing. but then...i'm not God and i still have that: nothing.
i just exist to...exist. music is a good friend who makes me work hard. but soon, i too will be a memory. to no one.
that's what happens when you turn invisible.